Sunday, December 20, 2015
Spend all your time waiting
for that second chance
for a break that would make it okay
there's always some reason
to feel not good enough
and it's hard at the end of the day
I need some distraction
oh beautiful release
memories seep from my veins
let me be empty
and weightless and maybe
I'll find some peace tonight
in the arms of the angel
fly away from here
from this dark cold hotel room
and the endlessness that you fear
you are pulled from the wreckage
of your silent reverie
you're in the arms of the angel
may you find some comfort here
so tired of the straight line
and everywhere you turn
there's vultures and thieves at your back
and the storm keeps on twisting
you keep on building the lies
that you make up for all that you lack
it don't make no difference
escaping one last time
it's easier to believe in this sweet madness oh
this glorious sadness that brings me to my knees
in the arms of the angel
fly away from here
from this dark cold hotel room
and the endlessness that you fear
you are pulled from the wreckage
of your silent reverie
you're in the arms of the angel
may you find some comfort here
you're in the arms of the angel
may you find some comfort here
Tuesday, September 22, 2015
Remember once the things you told me
And how the tears ran from my eyes
They didn't fall because it hurt me
I just hate to see you cry
Sometimes I wish we could be strangers
So I didn't have to know your pain
But if I kept myself from danger
This emptiness would feel the same
I ain't no angel
I never was
But I never hurt you
It's not my fault
You see those egg shells, they're broken up
A million pieces, strung out across the ground
Did you ever really love her
Or was it that you feared letting go
You should have known that you could trust her
But you pretend like I don't know
I ain't no angel
I never was
But I never hurt you
It's not my fault
You see those egg shells, they're broken up
A million pieces, strung out across the ground
I want to tell you that I'm sorry
But that's not for me to say
You can have my heart, my soul, my body
If you can promise not to go away
I ain't no angel
I never was
But I never hurt you
It's not my fault
You see those egg shells, they're broken up
A million pieces, strung out across the ground
Wednesday, September 16, 2015
我在尋找 也在迷失
尋找生活跟生存的差異 不斷執著或放棄
醒在這裡 睡在這裡
厭倦這裡 卻又離不開這裡
Oh My Hard City...
Tuesday, September 15, 2015
越认为自己没有.. 越要表现自己
I have tried my best？
Sunday, September 13, 2015
i am always being so talkative in my life and my surrouding, but when i come to face myself... my mind just go blank and my hands on those keyboard just go "stop it"... being naked off from a body maybe hard, but for now i see being naked off the life you are going is worse than hell. thou i have not see hell or never want to be there.. but hell does exist for a reason?
everyday when i open my eyes, first thought is that "i still alive?" and i start to walk out of my room.. everything's so real, my brother and 2nd mom and then i come to this messy kitchen... i see stuff lying around, food been made and lay there FYI my dad will go crazy when he sees all this.. head off to the toilet and then, i realize is this life? when i thought i want to end it, certain things start to keep me distracted. on the 10 September its a day for no to suicide day......
you know when human wants to hurt themselves there's alot of different ways.
And.. when u thought u found someone who can be there and share your life.. i am wrong.....
Tuesday, September 8, 2015
After 5 years, OMG like really? ok stupid but I see my frontpage all the html still look damn good and wind chime is still chiming.. Suddenly felt naked on exposing myself to blog for so many years. Just by looking back on those blog that I've did. i do actually gave in effort ya? or no..
look at us!
Saturday, May 29, 2010
FINALLY! for being MIA for so long, i bother to blog AGAIN. C: feel like switching to live-journal thou.
Bf is away for his NS taiwan trip for 26days olady! haha is really like finally? i dunno. starring at this screen reflecting of how i spent these days being alone and with family 1 word, "Fast". in a wink of eye today is Saturday already. i still rmb last week i just ask my dad to get me that famous chee cheong fun for next weekend and today is de weekend and of coz my nicest dad did get me chee cheong fun even thou he need to go to work. C: P.S he is only sweet at times.
and i cant believe i will go on shopping alone on thursday :O its like after like more den 3 yrs i go on shopping alone? or shud i say i nv did it b4? -_______- its always either with friends, Bf, or family. SO! ima grown up. LOL? -.-
i feel so much fresher now in my room as i have pack all my clothes in the cupboard, on my chair, on my bed or shud i say is all around my room. LOL :x gave away 4 shorts and throw away alot alot of unwanted Ts and dresses. i just realise i got like afew jeans skirt and shorts that i cant wear bcoz of de size is too BIG, which i just bought like last yr? maybe i shud really pig out and put on fast weight? O_O who is gonna sponsor me for buffets?
i am missing that slippers right now :C but i just bought a sandals yst. shall ask Bf get it for me :x he must be now happy shopping at taiwan and he is back TONIGHT, MIDNIGHT. dad did mention about fetching him, but half half ARGH. like wat Bf have told me, dont put too much hope so when he disagree im not that unhappy about it. after all he is my dad ya? i noe he loves this family and i also noe actually he loves me the most. just that i am a big girl now thats why he expects me to be independent. I KNOW LA DAD.
something to share :
Parents' Wish
To our dear child......
On the day when you see us old, weak and weary,
Have patience and try to understand us...
If we get dirty when eating,
If we cannot dress up on our own,
Please bear with us and remember the times we spent
feeding and dressing you up.
If, when we speak to you,
we repeat the same things over and over again,
Do not interrupt us, listen to us.
When you were small,
we had to read to you
a thousand and one times the same story
until you went to sleep...
When we do not want to have a shower,
neither shame nor scold us.
Remember when we had to chase you
with your thousand excuses
to get you to the shower...
When you see our ignorance on new technologies,
help us navigate our way
through those worldwide webs..
We taught you how to do so many things,
to eat the right foods, to dress appropriately,
to fight for your rights...
When at some moments we lose the memory or
the thread of our conversation, let us
have the necessary time to remember,
and if we cannot, do not become nervous...
As the most important thing is not our conversation
but surely to be with you and
have you listening to us...
If ever we do not want to eat, do not force us.
We know well when to and when not to.
When our tired legs give way
and do not allow us to walk without a cane,
lend us your hand,
the same way we did
when you first tried your faltering steps..
And when someday we say to you
that we do not want to live anymore,
that we want to die, do not get angry,
someday you will understand...
Try to understand that our age is not lived.
But survived...
Someday you will realise that,
despite our mistakes,
we always wanted the best thing for you
and we tried to prepare the way for you...
You must not feel sad, angry or ashamed
for seeing us near you. Instead, try to understand us
and help us like we did when you were young...
Help us to walk,
Help us to end our way with love and dignity.
We will pay you by a smile and
by the immense love
we always had for you in our heart..
We love you Child.
Dad
P.S he is my Dad and also my Mom :D
Bf is away for his NS taiwan trip for 26days olady! haha is really like finally? i dunno. starring at this screen reflecting of how i spent these days being alone and with family 1 word, "Fast". in a wink of eye today is Saturday already. i still rmb last week i just ask my dad to get me that famous chee cheong fun for next weekend and today is de weekend and of coz my nicest dad did get me chee cheong fun even thou he need to go to work. C: P.S he is only sweet at times.
and i cant believe i will go on shopping alone on thursday :O its like after like more den 3 yrs i go on shopping alone? or shud i say i nv did it b4? -_______- its always either with friends, Bf, or family. SO! ima grown up. LOL? -.-
i feel so much fresher now in my room as i have pack all my clothes in the cupboard, on my chair, on my bed or shud i say is all around my room. LOL :x gave away 4 shorts and throw away alot alot of unwanted Ts and dresses. i just realise i got like afew jeans skirt and shorts that i cant wear bcoz of de size is too BIG, which i just bought like last yr? maybe i shud really pig out and put on fast weight? O_O who is gonna sponsor me for buffets?
i am missing that slippers right now :C but i just bought a sandals yst. shall ask Bf get it for me :x he must be now happy shopping at taiwan and he is back TONIGHT, MIDNIGHT. dad did mention about fetching him, but half half ARGH. like wat Bf have told me, dont put too much hope so when he disagree im not that unhappy about it. after all he is my dad ya? i noe he loves this family and i also noe actually he loves me the most. just that i am a big girl now thats why he expects me to be independent. I KNOW LA DAD.
something to share :
Parents' Wish
To our dear child......
On the day when you see us old, weak and weary,
Have patience and try to understand us...
If we get dirty when eating,
If we cannot dress up on our own,
Please bear with us and remember the times we spent
feeding and dressing you up.
If, when we speak to you,
we repeat the same things over and over again,
Do not interrupt us, listen to us.
When you were small,
we had to read to you
a thousand and one times the same story
until you went to sleep...
When we do not want to have a shower,
neither shame nor scold us.
Remember when we had to chase you
with your thousand excuses
to get you to the shower...
When you see our ignorance on new technologies,
help us navigate our way
through those worldwide webs..
We taught you how to do so many things,
to eat the right foods, to dress appropriately,
to fight for your rights...
When at some moments we lose the memory or
the thread of our conversation, let us
have the necessary time to remember,
and if we cannot, do not become nervous...
As the most important thing is not our conversation
but surely to be with you and
have you listening to us...
If ever we do not want to eat, do not force us.
We know well when to and when not to.
When our tired legs give way
and do not allow us to walk without a cane,
lend us your hand,
the same way we did
when you first tried your faltering steps..
And when someday we say to you
that we do not want to live anymore,
that we want to die, do not get angry,
someday you will understand...
Try to understand that our age is not lived.
But survived...
Someday you will realise that,
despite our mistakes,
we always wanted the best thing for you
and we tried to prepare the way for you...
You must not feel sad, angry or ashamed
for seeing us near you. Instead, try to understand us
and help us like we did when you were young...
Help us to walk,
Help us to end our way with love and dignity.
We will pay you by a smile and
by the immense love
we always had for you in our heart..
We love you Child.
Dad
P.S he is my Dad and also my Mom :D
